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wtf, i just cried from laughter

July 12th, 2010

Ok, you all know I’m no fan of fanboys or the sheep that buy whatever polished turd apple is marketing to them on a given day (the iphone – it’s the most revolutionary phone – so revolutionary you don’t/can’t even make phone calls on it). Today, a coworker shows me this video of the iphone 4 vs HTC Evo:

I was laughing so hard a tear ran down my check. wtf did I just watch? So simple, yet hilarious. I want the one with the bigger Gee Bees too!

That said, any idiot who joins a class action suit against Apple/AT&T rather than just returning their iphone 4 over its major design flaw is looking for a handout and is part of the reason that America will continue on its downward spiral.

companies, people, products , , ,

wtf san leandro?

June 27th, 2010

Tax coffers running a little low – let’s raise the sales tax to 10% for 7 years. Nice move San Leandro city officials. Let’s waste time putting it on the ballot. Hopefully voters have a clue and vote against it.

At 10%, San Leandro will have the highest sales tax in the already expensive Bay Area. And let’s face it, San Leandro residents don’t have the highest incomes in the Bay Area. Who will it hurt? The poor and the businesses. Anyone with the means can and will shop in any of the neighboring cities or unincorporated areas and not pay the tax. (Don’t even get me started on metered parking – but that’s not just in San Leandro)

Let’s also raise sewage rates so we can spend tens of millions of dollars upgrading the sewage treatment plant.

And statewide – let’s see what else we can do to dig ourselves deeper. Raise bridge tolls? Take a tax advance on everyone’s future earnings (interest free I might add)? Those with the means will eventually get fed up and leave – and those with the means are the ones who will refill the empty coffers – only they will be gone. Then what will you do?

politics, rant , ,

wtf is with jealous husbands?

March 15th, 2010
hey jealousy

hey jealousy

Look homeboy, I never touched your wife. Relax. Even before the two of you got together.

Don’t get pissed at her. Don’t get pissed at me. According to wolframalpha, you are 5622 miles away. What are you worried about? The only thing that’s going to drive her away is your insecurity. To quote LL Cool J, “You’re the type of guy that gets suspicious…”

Well, we know how that song turns out.

people ,

wtf is with showing me your piece?

March 6th, 2010
packin' heat

packin' heat

I met some guy for the first time yesterday and in the middle of a mall parking lot he opens the trunk of his car and pulls out a handgun. He takes out the clip and then hands it to another guy who points it at a nearby building and pulls the trigger without even checking to see if there was a round in the chamber. He hands the gun back to the first guy, who then tells a racist joke, gets in his car and leaves.

wtf just happened? Strange afternoon.

people

check out our jewels, wtf?

January 2nd, 2010

First we had the video game, now we’ve got jewelry. That’s right folks – wtf jewelry has arrived courtesy of our friends at DiamondShark. We are one step closer to being certified as legitimate rappers. Now all we need to do is launch a clothing line, mix up a little cologne and maybe some overpriced water or crappy vodka. Ahh, the good life.

people, products ,

wtf should i ask for for christmas?

December 25th, 2009
vinyl record

who doesn't love a record?

Again with the questions.

People head over to wtflist for the answers. Like the one troubled soul who was searching for the answer to the eternal question, “wtf should i ask for for christmas?”

wtf do we look like? Santa “WTF” Claus? Makin’ a list, checkin’ it twice. gonna figure out wtf you want for christmas if you’re nice.

Oh we kid. Dude, we hope we helped you figure it out. Just a guess – was it 12″ and black? (who doesn’t want a record for christmas??)

people

wtf is with gap and old navy commercials?

November 21st, 2009

The holidays are here (almost) and GAP’s crappy holiday tv campaign has begun. I’m sure you’ve all seen them the commercial by now – it’s running every commercial break on every station and sometimes twice per break. It’s the one with the stomperific chanting, dancing and posing about Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa with people every shade of the rainbow. Seriously GAP, wtf? I’ve never seen such a blatantly commercial attempt at being all “inclusive”. The rap/chant is not interesting. The dancing and posing might have been cool ten years ago – it’s like a bad cheerleading practice using GAP outfits as uniforms (and using a place that looks like a gym to film only reinforces that feeling). GAP, wasn’t it enough to torture us with the horribly bad Old Navy Super Modelquin ads?

companies, rant , ,

wtf are you doing searching for career advice here?

August 24th, 2009
for doubling traffic

for doubling traffic

Did you know that wtf list ranks well for career advice? It’s true! Do a search on yahoo for “wtf is a good career for me” and you will find us. Looking at the referral stats for the site I found this steamy nugget. This makes me go wtf?! for a few reasons.  First, who searches for career advice like that? I’ve got a pretty good idea why you are unemployed. Second, what made you think we had career advice to dispense? Look at the last few posts! Do we look like an educated bunch? Do we sound employable?

But hey, we aren’t complaining. You just doubled our visitor count all by yourself. Be sure to put that on your resume before your next interview. To help, just print out the image above and tape it to your resume. It’s quite the accomplishment – you should be proud!

etc. , ,

wtf greedy bart unions?

August 16th, 2009
the bay areas not so rapid transit

the bay area's not so rapid transit

I know I will be cursing your name tomorrow when I have to drive with an extra 350,000 people on the road. You greedy bastards. What? While everyone else is getting laid off or getting pay cuts, it’s not enough to be the highest paid (even adjusted for cost of living) workers in the country? Damn, you work in a booth or drive an automated train and you get triple digits when your benefits are included.

————

Update:

“BART and the Amalgamated Douchebag Union have reached a tentative agrement to avert a strike, and service continues…”

rant , ,

wtf bay bridge driver for august 5

August 5th, 2009
drivers beware

drivers beware

This driving instructor is a perfect example of a wtf bay bridge driver. Over the last 100 feet leading up to the toll booth they changed lanes 5 different times. I’m guessing the blinker must have been broken on their shiny new blue Toyota Camry because I can’t think of any other reason not to use the blinker a single time. Great job continuing your demonstration of how to create traffic with unnecessary and excessive lane changes well beyond the toll booth. I have to give you credit for reinforcing stereotypes about two different types of drivers. This WTF Bay Bridge driver goes to you driver of a blue Camry with CA license plate 5W0B169.

And while on the topic of the Bay Bridge – CalTrans, just because you are building a new span to update the bridge it does not mean let the road surface of the current bridge go to hell. Patch a pothole or two. My car will thank you.

people, rant , ,